So last Sunday I called Weber, and Jean–who I suspect is in Minnesota–got my Silver Genesis working again.
Jean: I’ll be sending you a document, now just give me your email, see?
Me: Oh, thank you!
Jean: So now, you know where the manifold is, right?
Me: Yes, I see it in the booklet.
Jean: That’s good, then! You just…
At which point Jean and I engaged in a technical discussion that involved a phillips-head screwdriver, a crescent wrench, and a straightened coathanger. I printed her directions and got to work. We had ribs for dinner that night.
I still want a three-burner Weber grill; I still want to be in California again. I dreamed about California the other night. I was driving to Piazza’s–a lovely overpriced grocery store in Palo Alto–on my way home from the University of San Francisco.
Naturally, my dream didn’t include the hard parts of life in California, such as the grotty one-bathroom home we rented for $2200 a month, or Sandy’s temp work, or how I spent five years as a grant manager living the Perils of Pauline. It was like those dreams about people who have died, where you don’t remember their butthead moments or where they disappointed you, but instead you relive what was wonderful, and there is nothing wrong with that. I hope when I’m gone people remember my better moments.
I’m also missing those two years I was in the MFA program. I put in decent hours at FPOW (Former Place Of Work), but especially the last two years, my heart was with my family life and my writing life. The reverse is true now. Even when I have writing time now, it’s hard to pull my mind away from LibraryLand and AdminWorld (Michael Golrick, you know what I mean by the latter). I can’t quite get to that “shabbos” place where my head is peaceful enough to concentrate on My Craft.
So this morning we were at Fresh Market, a fancy-schmancy grocery store in Tallahassee, and near the checkout counter was Gastronomica, where I have an essay to be published late this year or early next. My eyes stung with pride. I saw people buying this magazine, taking it home, reading what I wrote. It mattered. I felt something. It was a remarkable, this-is-love, this-is-real-life sensation. It didn’t cure everything, but it was a bit of flotsam to cling to, something to keep me afloat.
My grill works, and I’m publishing an essay. I may not get to write anything new of significance for a while, but I can work to publish what I’ve written, and I can plan writing retreats. Lisa J., take off your belt with the heavy buckle and smack me until I apply to the one we spoke of at ALA.
Posted on this day, other years:
- Change is a hurricane or a door - 2016
- Channeling Winston - 2016
- Mellen, Sky River: what a mighty big waste... - 2013
- Free books, as in free beer, and more - 2009
- Grandmother, tell me again about the year you fooled your editor, your publisher, and the New York Times - 2008
- How To Lose Your Tech People - 2006
- First, Do No Harm - 2005
- Tiny Brain Cells Slowly Churning - 2005
- Comment about FRL Comments - 2005
That’s weird, isn’t it, the waxing and waning. Things are better at work for me now, and I’m having trouble writing my own stuff at home.
It’ll be there when you’re ready – at least that’s what I tell myself.
I can identify. Email on a Sunday morning (for work), half of Saturday at work for a public event, and next Saturday from 3 pm until 1:30 am at a fundraising/PR event for work.
I can identify with the moving issues also, but am sitting in an apartment which is 60% the size of my Connecticut house but costs me only $515 a month — including heat, in Wisconsin!
On the other hand, there are some wonderful advantages. Keep writing. It is hard to find the time, and my goal is to be half as good as you. You will release the info on where and when you are published so that we can support you by buying the issues.
Re waxing and waning, Joan Didion caught this so well in “The Year of Magical Thinking.” Grief is nonlinear. We want things to be in stages (whew, I’m through with THIS part!), or maybe at least *I* do, but instead it is in waves that loop back upon themselves. Laura, I wonder if that couldn’t be the point of that essay, should I write it.
I’m about to review office assistant applications… we had 38! But at least I can listen to NPR, shifted or otherwise, whilst doing so…
I think a person could live anywhere as long as there is a university and an NPR station. Ditto on letting us know when your essay is published. We will buy it and mail it to you for an autograph!
(aside) Oh Lord, where would I be without Piazza’s? (one bright point about this part of the world) Glad to hear the Weber issue has been resolved.
Reaching back a few posts, I read your code4lib presentation with great interest (even in its originally posted format…thank you, Apple). (lol about free beer vs free kittens) The biggest problem facing the kids I’m working with today is access to fiction. The OPAC sucks rocks, and worse, isn’t even in the picture for them. Access is my #1 thing to work on…because we all need a #1.